Emotional Effects Of Childbirth - Birth Order Traits Demystified - Middle Child Personality
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I would sometimes refer to the condition as middle child personality instead of middle child syndrome, mainly because I do not believe it is a sickness or disease, rather I see it as a special need.
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Characteristics of Middle Children
Technically, a middle child is an individual who is born in between two or more siblings. Being born in between is a bigger problem than what we think. Before we cite the characteristics, let us take a brief view of the some birth order traits, here goes. The eldest child is the leader, often he has strong decisive qualities that allow him to make firm decisions. This may be due to the expectations and special attention given to him by his parents. The youngest child is often lax and confident, probably the loudest and sometimes spoiled because the parents have used up their energies disciplining the others. The youngest is not much pressured than the eldest but never the less, she is given the attention she deserves. The middle child is then left with the biggest problem, what role could he/she take in the family?
The middle one, unlike the others, is not given much attention. The following are just some characteristics that define middle children. Note that not all of them or maybe even none may be observed in a middle. The middle has low self-esteem. He needs support for anything he does, sometimes talents are wasted when he does not pursue his dreams. The middle has a feeling of emptiness. She is always lonely and is jealous of others. This is a very broad trait, since it affects every aspect of her life. She may be a little weird, unfriendly and even worse, psychotic because of this feeling of emptiness. The two traits mentioned above can interact differently with different personalities. For example, an introvert middle child may prove to be more depressed and lonely than the extrovert middle child. There are a lot of possibilities for middle children, but the results are mostly negative.
Note: There are a lot of cases where middle children do not possess middle child personality. In some cases, attention is given to the middle one. For example, the middle one is the only girl and she is treated like a baby. Another example would be when the eldest is the laid back type who is a big loser, the middle then would take the role of the eldest as the leader.
The Possible Causes
There are two main causes of having middle child personality, identity crisis and lack of emotional support. Identity crisis is very common to all, it is something that we continue to struggle with. In fact, everyone wishes to be different so nothing can actually be done with it. The second is lack of emotional support. Because the eldest and youngest are the common favorites, the middle child is not given any support or attention. This unloved feeling makes them less confident and envious of others.
Is there a Solution?
There are proven solutions in preventing middle child syndrome, but severe cases of the condition may prove to be very tricky. There are a lot of opinions stated regarding this matter, I will only share my personal opinion. The middle child suffers from low self-esteem and is envious of others. Some say that they should be given the love and attention that was due a long time ago. I believe that this will only worsen the case, he/she should be aware of the situation and resolve the problem from within, by overcoming his emotions that were kept from childhood and by starting a new life. But that is just my opinion. Comments are very much appreciated.
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